I'm Back

Yes Yes!! It has been a while but I am back on. I've been away working and going to school to become an Occupational Therapy Assistant.

So things have been going well with me! My daughter is now 2 years old and I just feel like time has truly flew by! Currently she has strep throat and an ear infection in her right ear. So she isn't a happy little baby right now, but we are working with it. I was in the doctor office from 11:15am till 1:53pm! Sorry but for me that is a VERY long time. But I'm just happy she has been diagnosed and I'll be picking up her meds in a few from Walgreens.

Relationship wise, things have actually progressed and have been very well these days. He is working so hard to make sure everything is fine for us at the house, which I love and appreciate so much! Since I have quit things have been very...VERY tight, but we are making it through. Things are starting to come into place so we should be in a better place in November.

Oh and I'm trying to workout to get my sexy back:

I'll keep yall in the loop, hope everyone has been doing well!

Work n Love

Those two words should go together...Love and Work because they just do. 

       The love I have for my daughter makes me work hard to provide n care for her. The love I have for her pushes me to work with her, to ensure that she learns right from wrong. I want to help her but I also know she needs to do things on her own. I am so in love with my little girl! Seeing her brings me great joy. Don't get me wrong, at times I'm frustrated with her; even angry but I still love her.

LaShai and I

       The love I share for her father is a different t kind of love yet it still requires work as well. Daily work. Sometimes to save from having a pity argument I hold my tongue and don't speak. Everything shouldn't be about winning or losing, in a relationship it should be about what's best. Now there are moments when I MUST speak up for my own sanity! Lol

         See if you don't want to work at the love you have then I feel bad for your partner. I've been there...doing all the work and feeling so alone. It is really not a good feeling at all. Some days I feel like I'm back at square one and doing everything alone, but I know that is truly not the case. Yet is seems that way at times. Things have been improving between my daughter's father and I; hopefully they will continue to improve. I know things won't go back to before I found out because a piece of me that truly loved him died that day, but I think it can be better than what it is now. I actually believe that this can only make us stronger..well make me stronger. Only time will tell and with much prayer my feelings towards him will be more positive than their current negative.

I'll keep ya updated on my progress! :)

No kids

OMG!! Okay I love my boyfriend...he is amazing....but HIS DOG!!! OMG!! He is so damn annoying!! He gets on my damn nerves and he reminds me everyday of how NOT ready for kids I am. Yet I ask myself will I ever be ready for kids....assuming some people are not READY to be parents but things do happen.

Let's talk about this. His dog wakes us up around 7 or 8, even if we walked him really late the night before, it doesn't matter. He just wants us to woke up because HE feels its time for us to get up. This is SOOO annoying because if we had a late night, there is no sleeping in; well for my boyfriend yes because he can sleep through anything, but for me..NOPE! The dog will whine for NO DAMN REASON...just follow me around the house whining because he wants attention. He wont let me sleep because he is whining to get me to allow him to sleep in the bed. Just so damn spoiled!

Its just so hard sometimes because I care about my boyfriend and I enjoying being around his dog...sometimes...but a full time thing...is just not going to work right now for me. I know I'm selfish and really trying to do me, so that's why this is such a big problem for me. I need to be less selfish, but he is so annoying. He talks or does what he call "talking." He'll try so hard to talk to us when he is aggravated or bored, I just laugh and ask him to speak English since he wants to be heard. Those with pets may understand what I mean about the "talking" its just so strange, but at times so annoying. And it's crazy cuz I LOVE DOGS!! Thats all I've ever had my whole life, but this dog is spoiled beyond recognition. He'll whine if we don't share our food and sometimes he'll start barking at us! Can't even have anything romantic or sweet cuz he has to be in the mix or he'll start howling.

I need someone to just pray for me cuz PMSing right now and dealing with this dog is not going well.